I don't understand how these things happen, they just do. I woke up one Saturday at about two in the afternoon, and was hanging around in bed, pulling my pud. The phone rings, and it's Rachel on the phone.
"Hey wanker, what's going on?"
Now, Rachel is kind of hot, in that nerd-girl-with-a-rack kind of way. And we've had a few memorable encounters. Just thinking about that, I stiffened up, and started to beat harder.
"Not much, baby -- just thinking about you," I said wryly.
"Yeah, I bet, I can hear you beating it. God, you're unbelievable. Anyway, if you can drop your cock long enough to come down here, I've got something you'll want to see."
"Oh, I know you've got that, Rachel."
"Shut up. I wouldn't come near you. I've got a real boyfriend now." She's seeing some guy who actually wants her for more than her pussy. He actually seems as smart as her, too. And he's not a douche. See, this is why Rachel is awesome.
"Anyway, perv, I'm calling you because I know you're a perv, and there's something here I know that you'll want to see. I just called Fred, and he's on his way down."
"What, to the candy factory? Are you at work?"
"Yeah, I have to do some inventory today, so there's not too many people here. You think I'd want people to know I hang around with you?"
"What the hell are you gonna show me at the candy factory?"
"Listen, perv, either show or don't. I'll be here for a couple hours." And she hung up.
The hell? Is this some weird come on? No -- that's not like Rachel. When she wants it, you know. Anyway, she's not a girl to waste somebody's time, so I pulled on my jeans, lit a cigarette, and hopped in the car.
I get to the candy factory, which is just a boring brick building in an industrial park, and she buzzes me in. She's standing in the reception area with a clipboard. She's wearing a baseball jersey and jeans, and those rectangle glasses. "I see you made it, perv. No, don't touch me. Where the hell is Fred?"
"How should I know? You know how Fred is." Fred, Rachel and I used to hang out. And by hang out, I mean we had a lot of drunk threesome sex.
"Okay, whatever. Come on back here. You're gonna love this." We walked back through the factory area, which seemed to be shut down for the weekend, to some rooms that had a lot of drying racks. In the corner was some kind of black mannequin.
"So, this was supposed to be for the company's thirtieth anniversary -- a woman made entirely of chocolate. They were going to feature it at the annual shareholders meeting." And it was pretty much that -- a voluptuous chocolate statue, wearing a negligee made of some kind of frosting. Rachel rolled her eyes. "I don't know whose dumb idea it was, but when Jennifer, that cast-iron bitch in marketing heard about it, she shut down the whole thing -- she's afraid that the Winkerton Candy Company will get flagged as the bunch of pervs they are."
I'm already bored. "You dragged me down here to look at a chocolate statue? She's not even that hot."
"Oh, like that's ever stopped you before." She had me on that. "Anyway, I'm supposed to dispose of it, and I was just going to break it up, and throw it away... but then an image of you fucking the thing came into my head, and I couldn't stop laughing."
"So, you brought me down here to mock me? Is that it?"
"No, dumbass. I know you -- you'd fuck an electric outlet if you could get your dick in there. I brought you down here because I want to see you fuck this thing."
"Screw you, Rachel."
"Nope... not today. Today, you fuck that statue."
"Oh come on, Lambert," she said, putting on her baby voice, "won't you fuck that wittow old statue for little Rachel-Wachel?" She rubbed up against me, started rubbing my jeans, and gave me a long tongue kiss. "Please? Oh, I can feel how hard you are... tell you what... I'll get you started..." She unzipped my pants, pulled them down, got to her knees, and started blowing me. That girl knows how to suck a dick. "There -- nice and hard, and oooh, dripping already!" She stood up, and peeled off my t-shirt. "There, you and miss chocolate pussy are ready to go. Doesn't she look delicious? I'll give the two of you some privacy." And before I could say anything, she trotted out of the room, and closed the door behind me. Only then did I realize she had taken my clothes with her.
"God, she's a crazy bitch," I thought. And then I started thinking about whether to wait for her, or chase her, or what. Then I heard my stomach growl. I looked down at my growling stomach, and my erect cock, and couldn't help laughing as I looked over at my African Princess, the obvious answer to both problems. "Well, sweet thing," I said, laughing out loud, "let's check you out."
Really, it was a pretty amazing statue. Imagine a black Jessica Rabbitt, standing on tiptoe, wearing a yellow frosting negligee. I walked in a circle around it. She had her eyes closed, and was leaning over just a little, lips parted for a kiss. Beautiful tits and ass, and long, smooth legs. She even had long beautiful hair. "Well, sugar -- how about a kiss?" I put my lips against hers and stuck my tongue in her mouth, and what the hell?! Her mouth was filled with soft chocolate, and I could swear I felt a smooth gummy tongue in there. I couldn't help it, I started sucking on her face, and swallowing the chocolate that came out. "Damn, bitch! That was some kiss!" I kissed her again, and this time put my hand on the hard frosting on her tit. It crackled, and the frosting broke off in my hand, revealing a perfectly formed breast. A chocolate breast was more than I could resist, and I put my mouth over it and started sucking. It was sweet, and delicate, and melting in my mouth. I had chocolate and candy all over my face and hands. I started just eating the rest of the negligee, crunching the candy in my teeth, and giving her little nibbles all over. I don't eat a lot of candy, but I never wanted to stop eating this. Once I had the negligee mostly gone, I took another look at her: She had marks from where I'd been licking and sucking, but she was mostly intact. And then I thought, what about her pussy? Whoever made this thing gave that a LOT of attention. It looked perfect, even with chocolate pubes and a glistening chocolate clit. And it smelled... I don't know how to say it... it smelled like a candy pussy! And it was already glistening and wet, and I couldn't help it, I stuck my tongue in. It was like nothing else I've ever tasted in my life. The whole world melted away, and nothing existed but this hot, wet, chocolate pussy, that was dripping some kind of sweet hot goo somewhere between fudge, and maple syrup, god, I can't describe it, but all I wanted to do was lick and lick and lick that pussy. Then, suddenly, I realized I wasn't alone... and I'm thinking, Rachel, if you're here, please come fuck this thing with me. But it wasn't Rachel! It's the statue, and it's alive, and moaning with pleasure! It grabs my head and holds it against its pussy again, and so, obediently, I keep licking and licking. She sits on my chest, and pins me, and keeps grinding that delicious pussy into my face. With each moan of pleasure, there is another gush of caramel or fudge or honey into my mouth and throat -- its so good, that I almost don't realize that I'm drowning! My nose mouth and throat are completely filled with her hot melting love sauce, and my head is literally buried in her -- panicking, I jump up, and clear my airways. She is lying on her back in a puddle of her own juices, with a pouty look -- "Please, Lambert -- don't stop -- have some more..." and dipping her fingers into her chocolate pussy, she licks the sauce from her fingers. "Please, come down here and fuck me." I'm so freaked out, I just stare at this. What the hell is happening? This is impossible! But she doesn't care, and wetting her hands on her pussy, she reaches up with her delicate fingers, and wraps them around my cock, sliding them up and down, staring at my cock like it was a wonder of the far east. Up on her knees, she takes my cock in her mouth, and it was the smoothest thing I've ever felt. It felt like she had four tongues wrapped around it in there, and I just started fucking her head. Sometimes she would wince a little, and I saw that MY COCK HAD BROKEN THROUGH THE BACK OF HER HEAD! But as soon as I would pull it back, somehow the breaks would close up again. Eventually, I couldn't take it anymore, and thrusting forward, I cracked right through the back of her skull, and spurted come all over her back, and her ass.
"Oh, no, no, no..." she said. "That's no good. Little Lambert needs to give me the cream filling I need. Please Lambert, tell me you have more." She actually was crying little chocolate tears.
"Yes," I panted, "I have more."
"Oh, Goody!" She shouted, and slammed me down on the ground, hard, on my back, knocking the wind right out of me. She jumped in the air, and with a demonic grin, SLAMMED her pussy down onto my dick. She then started fucking me like a bat out of hell, moaning and screaming, and bouncing up and down faster than I'd ever been fucked in my life. As she fucked me, moaning and and bouncing, she started rubbing her chocolate tits, and white marshmallow started dripping out of them -- she squeeze them both, hard, and sprayed marshmallow into my mouth, and then fell on me for a kiss. Four tongues, like gummy worms, filled my mouth, and I was choking again on her syrup and sauce. Unable to breathe, and unable to move, because she had me pinned, I bit off one of the tongues, but another quickly took its place. Strugging and straining, I couldn't believe it -- I was going to die fucking some kind of chocolate demon doll. I started thinking that maybe, if I could come, that would end this, but on my second time, it can take me twenty minutes or more, even when I'm trying to come, and I know I can't hold my breath that long. Just as I was starting to black out, she took her face off of mine, and screamed! Once I could blink the chocolate from my eyes to see what was going on, I realized that while she was riding my pole, Fred was here, too, and was fucking her up the ass! She seemed almost paralyzed with joy, her face frozen in an "O", making a low, guttural howl.
"Fred!" I shouted, "thank God you're here!"
"I don't know what the hell this is," he shouted back, "but damn if I don't want a piece of it!"
She suddenly became angry. "Shut up, the two of you! Fuck me! Please, please fuck me!"
She started to orgasm, and hard -- it felt like pop rocks in there, and as she started to squeeze, Fred and I started to moan in unison, as we've done many times before, and as we both came into her, she exploded into pure liquid -- like a giant water balloon, filled with hot fudge.
We both lay there, on our backs, panting, covered in chocolate. The whole room was covered in chocolate, like some kind of chocolate bomb had exploded.
"Jesus Christ!" shouted Rachel, as she stormed in. "Fred, when did you get here? What did you bastards do? Who is going to clean all this up?"
We got out of there, fast.